Date: Tue Nov 2, 1999 3:24 pm

Subject: Taking a virtual vacation to the Bahamas

Dear Group,

I am pleased to report that my recovery from benzo's continues. I am overjoyedto say the least and who wouldn't be after enduring what I have over the past one half of my life.I feel great everyday and I have no benzo related problems other than the financial ones.What is becoming a problem is keeping up with the volume of onelist email, and dealing with technical problems.

I have had some major email system problems that forced me to delete my entire mail program and start fresh. I have lost all mail and all folders twice now and can't help but to feel like I got the cart in front of the horse somehow, in all my excitement. What a headache! I have decided to go on "digest" for now. I have decided to back away from theboards, the list, and that crazy I village set up as well. (hey Jane, it was agood idea but the damn thing won't work half the time!) I need to spend a few days getting to know my computer better, and doing something's that are unrelated to benzo's.

I want to help others. I want to be as supportive as I can be. I love to be involved BUT, I am over whelmed with the amount of time it takes. I'd like to go to the Bahamas with Geraldine for about a week and get a new perspective on it all but since that is not possible I am just going to take a little break, learn how to type right, and learn more about my computer.I can't seem to do that without saying a couple things to hold you over :~)

Remember:

It is not your fault you are in these shoes.

Don't blame yourself.

Don't feel guilty.

Focus your energy on your healing.

Recovery is a full time job.

Maintaining your health once you get it back is almost a full time job too so prepare yourselves. As many of us who are recovered, or are very near to being recovered have said before, do all you can to help your body heal. Eat right..............(for your blood type if possible) Drink lots of water...........(add some fresh squeezed lemon juice to speed upelimination of toxins) Consider the benefits of meditation, yoga, deep breathing exercises, prayer andthe basic premise of self care and quiet time. The body heals the most while resting. Do all you can to promote restfulness and inner peace.

Doing so gets you in touch with your intuition and as Rik said there lies the answers to many of your questions.Look for Natural Healers and avoid Docs and more meds as much as you can. Check references! Avoid stressful situations. Ask for help. Try to consider the feelings your benzo problem causes in your loved ones. The fear, the helplessness, and the loss of the person you were before. Put yourself in their shoes and try to communicate about "it' all you can.

If we want our families to hear us, we have to hear them. Assure them that one day you will be better than your old self and believe it. Practice positive thinking. Change the recordings in your mind from I feel like hell to I am getting better day by day and my pain and suffering are a sign of my healing, if you can. If your arm hurts think about your leg. If you are scared of leaving home, be thankful you have a home to hide out in for a while.Don't sweat the little stuff. The big stuff needs your full attention.

Without your health nothing else really matters as you know now.I have never been more healthy than I am right now and for the past 5 or 6 Iwas sure I would die from the madness benzo's caused my health. I am so much stronger than I knew and you are too.

To all the new members, welcome and God Bless You for your efforts to findhelp. To all my friends of the past 7 months, your doing great and I can't waitto great you at the finish line. I wish getting here didn't have to be such hell but just hang in there and keep taking baby steps until you feel stronger.Take good care of each other. Keep the faith. Thinking healing thoughts and saying prayers for you all.

Love,

Cindy