Date: Sat Mar 31, 2001 2:59 pm

Subject: Long post....

Hi

I would like to say thanks to everyone who replied to my question about sugar, it really helped a lot.

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I will tell you a litte about how I got off of Benzos.

I started in February 2000 to taper from Xanex 2mg, and did it with great help from my dear husband. In Denmark like every where else, the doctors writes Benzos prescriptions but they don´t have anything to offer, when people don't want to take this stuff any more. My husband made a schedule to taper from, and I ended my taper on May the third 2000, the day before my 42-years birthday . By that time we had not heard of Heater Ashton, but later in the springtime we finaly found Ray´s site and this board and it was such a relief. Finaly there was some one who understood us, believed in us and cared for us.

As it have been for all of you, it was some rough months. The anxiety was awful, and I could not walk on the streets alone, I could not be alone by my self, and I was afraid to be together with other people. I was afraid just beeing me. I spend four months daily stareing in the wall far to afraid to move. The "new" world was too scary for me. I also had serveral physical symptomes (over hundred). I thank God, that I didn't had or have trouble sleeping. I sleep like a baby the whole way through, and I still do.

After being 11-months of off Xanax I have not completely recovered, but I feel much, much better and I am able to do things that I months ago would not even have dared to think about.

I still have anxiety, but not as powerful as when I was on Xanax. The worst thing for me right now is the agoraphobia. I go for small walks every day, but it really is a tuff one. Do any of you have a suggestion, I would be glad to hear about it. :0)

I have got a lot of emotionel issues. for instance I have a very strange feeling that when I look back on the years of Xanax, that it was not me going through those years but someone else. I feel I have been a spectator to my own life. I am not able to feel that I (used to) love my family. I have a lot of other emotionel baggage, but I hope my real emotions will return some day.

After all, I am greatful each day I wake and I feel ok. I couldn´t have handled the taper and the w/d without my husbond. He has been and he still is a very big support in my life.

Thanks

Linda

Copenhagen/Denmark